40 Dares to a More Fulfilling Relationship with Your Teen

Many of us have tweens. Thankfully not yet teens. (Can I get a "Thank you heavens!" LOL) I have a younger child that also is definitely entering tween zone... like a year ago. Every child enters tween-hood at a different age and at a different maturity. So I like this book, "With All Due Respect" to help to try to work on the relationship with your child(ren) and the realisation that every child enters tween-hood at different times.

We all, as parents, have something in our relationships with our children that need work on. It is just the simple truth. And this book is helpful in guiding you to that- both figuring out the issues and helping you figure out how to come to a solution.

In this book, it says 40 days but realistically, I am going to say out of the gate, it is more like 40 dares. No way you can do it 40 days. Sorry.

Why?

Because relationships are complicated. They give great ideas in this book, With All Due Respect" but they forget that in saying 40 days they are setting people up for failure by virtue that easing the techniques in take more a day to become a full part of your repertoire. Just like when you are trying to build muscle. You have lift weights for days before seeing the results. This is more then matters of heart and mind and therefore take longer.

I think the ideas are fabulous though. A lot of introspection. One has to be open to reading this and changing. Being honest with oneself. Wanting to take the leap of faith and wanting to change themselves.

This is a one of the better parenting advise books I have read in a long time because it makes you go inward to change your parenting and that is helpful. I think that I have to modify it a little bit because my family is a family with different belief systems in it. I have to, even for myself, modify it a little to work for my family but, really I think it is a very good book.

The issues I have with it is that while it gives great tips and such for any parent, it is very focused on faith. So someone who could benefit from this may not read it especially if they are struggling in their faith or has no faith. That being said, I think me personally, I can skip over some of those things and focus on the stuff that is useful to me if I am having faith issues or don't believe in God. But some people won't even attempt to open the book and that is where I feel it could be otherwise helpful to them. (Or even go so far as to say to bring someone to faith).

The reason it bugs me sometimes, is because while I can see the good of having faith be involved in it, especially if you are religious or spiritual, it can seriously distract from the point that is being made. Like it is defending or defining itself (the goal of the book). I see the goal of the book and it is actually well written.  For example, I wish they would keep the scripture quotes at the end of each chapter rather than beginning. It means that the focus is on the goal. It means that the it goes with the end of the chapter and with the pray with us section.

Something I really like that in the beginning of the book they realise that people have many different kinds of relationships in relation to kids. Married, Single, Divorced, Modern. Mine is modern. I am very much separated. So a lot is in flux with the relationship with my kids' father and even with them. I want to grow and change in them.

Also, each dare, day or chapter is only a few pages. It is more like a devotional. Something you can do every day no matter how busy you are. Whether you are on a bus, do it after you brush your teeth, do it at lunch, or after the kids go to bed, reading it literally takes minutes. It is very doable and there is NO reason any parent can't do it.

It is not a sit down and read the entire book by yourself in one sitting. You can more read this each day over a month or more (how long ever it takes you, it will be fine). You will find something to help you within this book and will help  your relationship with your children, in my opinion, no matter their age. Even possibly most any relationship in your life.

Also, get a notebook when you read this. Seriously. It will be helpful. You can journal your process and examine a lot of your parenting styles and even grow yourself. There are questions at the end of each dare for you to really examine what your goals are as a parent.

Come in with an open mind and you will grow as a person and as a parent.

ALL THE DARES-- ARE WORTH IT! DO IT!
Seriously! Do it! 

No matter the faith you follow, this is a great book with a lot of profound advise, help, and guidance to help you become the parent you want to with your teen!